you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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