A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Are you a tree? No.

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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boobs

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops