Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Where is my tractor?

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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