Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Whats white and all over my room? paint

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

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rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops