Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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20

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops