pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops