You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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knock knock who's there? refelection reflection who? reflection in the mirror, it's you -lINDz@Y $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ s/0 to my B0oFrand J0rdan MiLaRR

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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