hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

thumb_up thumb_down +114

You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

20

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a black man jumps in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

black people. that is all...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

how long has dibey got left like :)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops