Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

thumb_up thumb_down -179

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

thumb_up thumb_down +178

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +116

Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

thumb_up thumb_down

The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops