How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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69

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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Women's Rights.

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops