What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

Dont look at me.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

There once was a man from Nantucket.

A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

Men's Rights

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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