What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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Yes.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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