What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

thumb_up thumb_down +8

who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -94

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

thumb_up thumb_down +147

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

thumb_up thumb_down +51

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Simon says; "You're adopted."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops