My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

George Bush.

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

what sucks? things that suck

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

America

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...