Get in the car.

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Women's Rights.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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A man buys free health care...

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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