What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -170

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops