What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

what did the man say to the other man? hi

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Yes.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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