What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

I have no soul so I must consume yours

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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