What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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what sucks? things that suck

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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