Where is my tractor?

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Women's Rights.

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

Simon says; "You're adopted."

20

Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

So you there Red?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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