How are you this morning?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Word play, punch-line, joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -132

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

thumb_up thumb_down +83

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

thumb_up thumb_down -167

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops