Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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I'm hungry.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Women's Rights.

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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