A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

thumb_up thumb_down -9

PATHETIC

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -113

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

thumb_up thumb_down +58

3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops