Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

Are you a tree? No.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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