Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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You

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Yes.

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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