What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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