Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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5

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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A man buys free health care...

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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black people. that is all...

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The Olympics

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops