Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

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What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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