Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

sexual intercourse.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

black people. that is all...

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

The Olympics

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...