Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Miley Cyrus.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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