Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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