Simon says; "You're adopted."

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

A homeless man comes home from work.

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

a black man jumps in a pool.

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

Men's Rights

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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