Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops