Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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1,984

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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