why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

Men's Rights

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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