What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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Women's Rights.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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