A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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You

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Yes.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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