Simon says; "You're adopted."

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

Are you a tree? No.

What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

Women's Rights.

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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