What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Simon says; "You're adopted."

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops