When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Miley Cyrus.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops