Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

thumb_up thumb_down -65

A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -42

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Women's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops