How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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