A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Miley Cyrus.

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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PATHETIC

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops