A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Apple.

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What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

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Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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