Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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i like cats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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