So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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