How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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Men's Rights

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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i like cats

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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