Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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Womens rights

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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Penis.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops