Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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