A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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Hi

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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