Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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Justin Bieber

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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