Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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Men's Rights

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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