What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

A baby seal walked into a club.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

69

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

What does 1+1 equal? 2

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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