Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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