How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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How do you call a black man? By his first name.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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69

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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