Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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what sucks? things that suck

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops