Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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