What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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Hi

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i like cats

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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Jews...

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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You copy and paster!

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sexual intercourse.

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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