Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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what sucks? things that suck

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69

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Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

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So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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sexual intercourse.

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How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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America

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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