Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -177

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +115

Mexicans are like waffles

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

thumb_up thumb_down -15

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops