What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Dont look at me.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops