Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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