2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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