Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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