roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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