What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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1,984

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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