Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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?"what's up" "A preposition"

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Hi

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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1,984

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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