The Bible

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Why is your face? Because.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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