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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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