What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

What does 1+1 equal? 2

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Who has the biggest cock A rooster

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

Why did the moron jump through the window?

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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