I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

69

400 asian people walked in a bar

whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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