The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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69

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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