Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

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lebron

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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?J?o?k?e?

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Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

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"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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A Black man walks into a gay bar. He has a great time because he is perfectly content with his sexuality.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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