What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Indeed.

What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

Q: why didn't the little black boy have a father? A: because he unfortunately died at the age of 48 with pancreatic cancer.

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

Penis

space is fun

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

This sentence is a lie.

whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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