Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

Im batman...suck it losers

why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

milly, milly, milly, cat

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

27

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

You know what is not cool? Fire.

Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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