Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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