You ever notice when geese fly in a V there is one line that is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese in that line.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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Did you know?

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven murdered sixes wife and kids and said he was next.

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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