A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Women's rights.

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How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

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Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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The WNBA.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the fence open, so it wandered around and happened to cross a road.

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What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

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I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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