Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's Pink And Wet? A chewed up piece of Bubble gum.

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

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Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? A: Ow.

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Future last words Guess who edition: "This new prototype Ferrari XZ handles like a God even at full speed!...Well, if God had no brakes and his turning ability suddenly disappeared when going at over 300 kilometers per hour that is..." "Uh oh now! Another heart attack! Where is mah medical weed? SHAAAAAROOOOOOON!" "Please haters, lower your guns, I will stop singing! Beliebe me!" Moral: "OMG I AM ONLY THE SIXTH MOST USELESS THING NOW!" "MY BODY IS NOT READY! Urgh mah chest... CHAROOOOOOON!

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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I C U P White stuff

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

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Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

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why did the T-Rex eat the other dinosaur? Because it is a carnivorous animal.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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