How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

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Obama walks into a hospital....

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Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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men's rights activists

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops