Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Due to the fact that the man asked who's there instead of promptly opening the door, the women on the other side was raped and killed, because she went to that house to seek help.

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

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Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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