Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink The bartenders says no, because she is a woman, and he is a sexist Women are still not equally treated in this world

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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