Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

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If i was a painting... Id hang myself

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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69

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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