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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What's green, smelly, and in a swamp? Casey Anthony's Baby

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Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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A Weight loss service that works

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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