Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

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What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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How about that airline food?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops