a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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roses are red hula is hula when i walk in cass i see a big tula

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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