what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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Once upon a time, a handsome prince met a beautiful princess. They both fell in love with each other. They then got married and lived happily ever after.

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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baby seal walks into a bar

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why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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What's half of 8? o

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kiss me?

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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