How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what is the difference between 10 and 3 7

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the Asian man go into space? Because he was an astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

thumb_up thumb_down

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your momma's so fat, she's at risk of a number of cardio-vascular problems, including high blood pressure, leading to heart disease, stroke, type II diabetes, and a premature death. She also has an elevated risk of contracting cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? Five.

thumb_up thumb_down +207

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is brown and sticky?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops