Why did the chicken go down the road? He was in a KFC truck and was headed to his death...

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

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mommy, mommy, the ice cream man is coming can i have a dollar? sure sweetie. YAY! Goes up to ice cream truck, ice cream man asks what would you like little boy, would you like chocolate, vanilla, str.... Ice cream man steals small boy.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. Everyone shoots her.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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why did the chicken cross the road? -----it didnt

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy are stranded in the middle of a desert. After many days of not finding food, water, or shelter they contemplate cannibalism to survive, but can't decide who to eat. The mexican dies first for an unrelated reason

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops