How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

bob saget

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Good one...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the point of going to college? There is none.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops