A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

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What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

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Women's rights.

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

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How did the girl get rid of a fever? She took medicine.

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knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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