How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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Why are Asians good at Math? Because they are bad at English.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops