Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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Why does a woman with a little dark skin and black hair a Native American? Because she smells.

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

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A bus with 11 passengers is making its final stops for the night. At main street it drops of 6 people and picks up 2, at broad it drops of 3 and picks up 4, at 3rd street it drops of 5 and picks up 1, and finally at 6th street it drops off 4 and picks up 0. How many people are still on the bus? 13 if you include the dead bodies in the back

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

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Knock, knock. *answers door*

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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Roses are red vielots are blue but they aren't as sweet as you.Can you be my Valentine ny choclate cupcake will you me my choclate

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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