Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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Old, Asian, Woman who drive

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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FIRE!!

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Why does life suck? Because it does

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Donald Trump

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse replies "My wife is dying of terminal cancer."

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Asians

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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What did the girl with AIDs receive for her birthday? Unprotected sex

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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