How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Orange" "Oh, hey."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Did you hear about the boy with the treehouse? He caught his mom cheating on his dad in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do black people and white people have in common? They are both mentioned in this box

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Rebecca Black sings a song.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

wanna hear a joke. i do to

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops