Paper shield.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

Lacrosse

Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

whats the difference between a black rapist and a white rapist? the black rapist is black

2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

Wanna hear a joke womens rights

Watch brand new car videos at carvideos website

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...