A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Call me Mr. Flinstone, for that is my surname.

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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why did the guy with cancer die? because he had cancer

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What shakes and twitches and can be found at the sea bottom? A scuba diver running out of oxygen.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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