Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

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A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

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Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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2 corpses are sitting on a bridge one fell down both are dead

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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