So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? bullshit!!

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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