some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

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shauns beautiful

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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What just hit my face? The floor

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

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What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

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You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poetry

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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