Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

Knock Knock whose there your biological parents REALLY No

What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

How do you get a tower to move? Hit it with a plane.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

I just pooped in my boyfriends mouth. He ate it. Ps. I am a boy

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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