What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

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what did the little boy get for christmas? A BIKE!

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Doctor, I keep imagining Doctors. *hayball rolls*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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