Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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why was Ralph depressed? Because his family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn’t quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family’s murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family’s killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer’s whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers’ home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers’ body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn’s life didn’t, and wouldn’t, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him “You’re finally home Ralph, you’re finally home.”

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Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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rocky is here again.......................

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish

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What time is it? 10:58

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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