What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Shut the cork up!

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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