How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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Why did the plane crash? I don't know. I wasn't on the plane. Its likely, based on the damage, that everyone on board died and therefore couldn't tell you either.

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Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny and frankly, I do not see why people think they are so funny.

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A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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What's worse then the holocaust? Stepping on a lego.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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i can't stand cripple jokes

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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