Sally walked into a bar and asked for a drink. Because she was under 21 they denied her request,

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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a man jumps of a cliff and ..... hits the ground

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What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Safe sex MR

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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