What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

24

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

While I was having sex... Just kidding, I can't get laid.

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

He walked in a bar

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

THE GAME

Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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