Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

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whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the creepy old man do to the child? Took him to baseball practice

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops