A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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Roses Are Red Violits Are Blue Screw it RUN!!

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A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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Once upon the time.... It was 12 o´clock

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

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Why was six afraid seven? Well, ever since six took an arrow to the knee he wanted to know who shot it. so he did some investigating, looked up some records and found seven was in the same war as him. then he thought about it, the big 7 scribed on the arrow he got shot with. Right then and there pain went into his back shooting upwards. He smacked the ground, and in his last moments of life saw seven standing above him. If your expecting another end down here then your a stereotype.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Youre mom is so dead...

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

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What is the difference between England and yogurt? One is a Western-European country and the other is a dairy product.

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Roses are blue vilotets are yellow, obviously I don't know this rhyme so well u have aids and will die of cancer at the age of 25, and so will ur mom

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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