Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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What are jews without the holocaust? Alive

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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