Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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Maturity is a virtue.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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Q: What do you call a man from south korea? A: I don't know, but I'm not letting him drive my car.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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Girls soccer

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

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Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

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Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

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What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

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What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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