what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Just two animals that are judged.

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

Hi.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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