Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

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What do you call a sheep on a trampoline? Disorientated.

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

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Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

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My mom's dead

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Q: What do you do if A bunch Of black Guys Are raping a white Girl A: Throw A Basketball at them.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? Unloading them with a pitchfork

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops