why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what purple and jolly barney who doesnt love his charactorial warmth!# not weird

thumb_up thumb_down

Seven

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops