Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

Due to the wildlife conservation program prevalent in the neighborhood, the chicken was able to cross the road safely.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

Basically copying you.

Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

How high is the sky? True or False

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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