- Anti Joke

what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

whats 69+2? 71

whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

why did the girl fall off the swing ? because she had no arms.

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

What is worse than a papercut? Losing your legs in Vietnam.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

A man walks into bar carrying a nondescript glass bottle of beer. The bartender speaks up in a harsh tone "We don't allow outside drink here buddy! If you're drinking here, you're buying it from here! The man replies, "Oh I'm sorry, it's just that this isn't a normal beer. Every time you take a swig from it, you are granted one wish!" The bartender, who is at this point getting visibly irritated, "I ain't got no time for fairy tales. Screw off!" The man seemingly unfazed by this anger tells him, "I'm not any kind of liar. I have three sips left. You can have them if you want." The bartender snatches the bottle with his unwashed hands from the man. "Fine" he says gruffly "I'll drink your magic beer." He thinks for a brief minute and says to himself, "I wish I had an expensive sports car." and takes a drink from the bottle. No later then a second later, a Ferrari pulls up into the driveway. It is a sleek and dark red color. It was of the latest model and did not have a single scratch whatsoever. The bartender's eyes pop wide open in astonishment and he quickly makes his second wish, "I wish I had a beautiful girlfriend!". And he took another drink. No later than five seconds, A leggy 5'7 blonde bombshell steps out of the entrance. She dons a short white skirt, Long red stiletto heels and a jet black spaghetti strap top. The bartender starts to sweat and looks a little nervous. "And my final wi-EUGHAAAHGGHHH!" The bartender collapses from the floor drooling from the mouth. It turns out that the liquor he was drinking was 180-proof alcohol that his old liver could not take. The blonde woman steps back and lets out a disgusting shriek. "Ewww, this old ugly hobo just ODed on the floor. Can we go somewhere else for drinks Jeremy?" Her boyfriend replies, "Yeah good idea babe. This place looks a trash heap anyway. You deserve better." The couple do not hesitate in stepping into their sleek red Ferrari and driving off. The man who had given the bartender the beer proceeded to check the dead man's pockets and rob it of all of it's contents. Nobody ever caught the man, and not a single person in the bar cared enough about the bartender to call 911. Moral of the story: Magic does not exist and life sucks.

Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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