What do you get when you mix a baby and chemical waste? A bad smoothie.

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? I dont know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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I bont really understand dyslectic peapole

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

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from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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