''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Ben: Something smells like updog. Jenny: What's updog? Ben: Nothin' much

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

thumb_up thumb_down +7

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

69

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Well, I have to go eat again "Axel Knight". See you around soon enough, just give me a call if you want me around... Hopefully I find a fucking telescope so I can read the code on the chip thingie... Damn I am hungry. See you around sugartits.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops