A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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what is red and lies in all four corners of the room? a baby that was playing with a chainsaw.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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I like jokes.

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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Knock Knock Who's there? You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy. You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy, who?

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Q- what the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? A- The Wheelchair

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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