Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

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One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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When life gives you lemons, sell them. Rejoice in your free money.

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bite me

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7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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