How many times does it take a blond to start a car? Usually once; however, the weather may have an impact how well the engine will spark.

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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A man. That is all.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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I am really good at math debating

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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