What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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010010101210001010 You dirty girl

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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why did the fat lady hop on one foot,because she lost the other foot to diabetes. ?

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

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KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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