Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

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what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

41

Stealth baseballs record

What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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