Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

Your friend is so gay, he has consensual sex with other men. and enjoys it.

What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

Keanu Reaves

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

What do you call a baby with no arms nor legs? An infant lacking limbs.

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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