My three children are three big mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

thumb_up thumb_down -113

A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

thumb_up thumb_down +28

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A Black Man walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops