A baby seal walks in to a club

What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

What did Osama say before he was shot? Nothing, it was a surprise attack.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

Roses are red Violets are... The poem was never finished due to the fact that the reader had narcolepsy and promptly fell asleep.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Why did the 10-year-old boy get on the computer? He had to finish a project for Social Studies, and it was due the next day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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