Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

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feminine literature

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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What do you call a black man carrying a bag full of drugs? A police officer who has just confiscated the bag from a drug dealer and is on his way to send the bag off to be destroyed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a tumor Doctors give it 6 weeks before I die...

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Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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I friended Paul Walker on Xbox, but he's always in the Dashboard.

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What's the difference between a duck? An orange.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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the top 6 dictators who have died this year Moammar Gadhafi Kim Jong IL Osama bin ladden Saddam Husein Steve jobs Internet Explorer

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So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

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Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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