The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

I had my period 3 days ago.

My butt!!!!!!!!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

Knock knock "Who's there?" Blood on the Dance Floor "Ha!"

what happened at the end of the korean marley and me? dinner

If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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