why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

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Why Did The Monkey Fall Out Of The Tree? Because It Was Dead

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

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Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

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How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

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everyone wonders y grandmas dont wear bra's its because if youre that old u might die putting it on

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Roses are red Violets are orange Thats odd, my violets are somehow orange

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

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Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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