What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Dont look at me.

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Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

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1+2 = 6

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Q: A Blonde and a Brunette fall of a building which one hits the ground first? A: The Brunette because she ways 200 pounds and the Blonde weighs 100.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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How do you make a blonde stupid as hell. Give birth to it

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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