A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

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What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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dildo

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Which is longer? A rope...

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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What happens when you breed a Siberian Tiger with a California Condor? Nothing. The tiger does eat the condor though and you are found out by a neighbor and charged with animal neglect, animal cruelty, and possession of two endangered species. You are fined $100,000 and go to jail for 5 years during which you are sodomized.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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Hi

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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Roses are red Violets are blue, You are reading jokes online, Go make some friends, or take up knitting because it has many benefits.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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