How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

Whats 1+1? window!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

why did the man die? he got shot

Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

Dead girls can't say no.

so there are 2 muffins in an oven,1 says to the other "holy s**t its hot in here!" and the other says,"omg!its a talking muffin!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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