One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

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what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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Q., Why did you mum eat mum on ur mom go die mom niga nigga cut me hang me lolololo A.my cat died shut up newb lololololo

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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How are cars made? By magic.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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What does wasabi spell backwards? Ibasaw

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A black guy, a white guy, and an Asian guy walk into a library. They were getting help from the Asian guy on their math homework.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Knock Knock Who's there

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

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so theres this big moose, and it walks into a convenience store and asks the lady bitch "where are the potatoes?" and she says "ehh, down aisle 5" so he goes down isle five, and there aint no potatoes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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