Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

Knock Knock! Whos There? Paul Okay I was expecting you

why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

You smell like shit

why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

What sentence on this site is the biggest cause of forever alone. "No comments yet. Be the first"

There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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