roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

why did the man die? he had cancer

a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Adolf Hitler.

what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

Wait! hundred billions!

Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

Your grandma's cookies.

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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