People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

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Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

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Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

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What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

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Please don't rape me.

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What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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