What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

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What's 9 plus 10? 19

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Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not quite sure, but I just realized that my new pair of boxer briefs has ripped along the seam. Oh, and earlier this morning, I stubbed my toe pretty bad. The nail is all purple and the toe is all swollen, it was bleeding profusely until I put three bandages over the wound. It's still throbbing with pain. Oh, and also, a few months ago, I lost my job. It wasn't because I was constantly late or anything, it was more because as a server, I had been required to lift trays and stand and walk for the entirety of my shift. The only problem is, that about a year ago, I was involved in a serious car accident (once again, an occurrence that had not been due to my own actions). This car accident severed my spine in the L5 region. I can now barely walk for long periods of time, I find it impossible to run, I can no longer play sports and enjoy being a 21 year old male. I am in constant pain and it affects my breathing, my legs, the rest of my back, and also my teeth (due to the neurological connections dealing with the spinal cord). I am now currently looking for a new job, a more suitable job, to help sustain my hectic lifestyle. No, it is not a lifestyle of parties and what not, it is merely the lifestyle of living under roof and owning a used car. I have an alcoholic mother and my childhood was devoid a father. I raised myself, and to this day, I still have no family to help me through my financial struggles. I need nearly 2000 dollars in less than a week in order to pay all my bills, have my car fixed, and eat for another month. The only problem is, I have a dollar and 58 cents to my name. I wish I was this chicken, crossing roads, and what not, not just to get to the other side, but to live a better life. But, one can only wish.

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Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Kuo-n7Du0

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What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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