How many babies can you fit in a blender? Depends how hard you push.

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I got on a bus, and immediately found that sitting on a bus is boring. I will never climb on top of a bus again.

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I am a women

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

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What was Hellen Keller's Dog's name? Kamikaze Go, it was the first Akita Dog in the United States.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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Why did the 6 year old girl go to therapy? Because her step dad raped her.

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"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like I'm a dinner roll!" Yes, well that's a side effect of your brain cancer.

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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