What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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Vagina Boob

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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Q- How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A- You Poke Her Face

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

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What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

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did you know, that a Bear has 42 teeth? massive erection.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

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What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops