A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Twinkle Twinkle little wh**e close youre legs youre not a door. youre gonna get an S,T,D, youree only wanted cause youre free... Twinkle Twinkle little Wh**e youre cheeper then the dollar store

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than being a 40 year old virgin? Being a 12 year old girl in Africa who gets raped everyday to feed her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What does a giraffe say to the other giraffes? A: Nothing, giraffes do not have vocal cords and are therefore unable to make any sounds, much less speak; not to mention a giraffes brain is far to underdeveloped to talk in a spoken language.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

96

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hi im a joke i eat turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops