What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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(Put joke here)

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In Soviet Russia You drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

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What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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Q: If 2+2=Fish, then what does 3+3=? A: 6.

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A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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Why was the stress line down? Because now the population is one-hundred short of yesterday.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

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Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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