what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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Bill: Hey Scott, do you have the time? John: My name is John, you must have mistaken me for someone else. Bill: Oh. I apologize for the inconvenience. John: No problem. By the way, the time is 3:34. Bill: I don't actually need the time, me and Scott just have this inside joke of me asking the time when we both very well know that he refuses to wear a wristwatch. John: Alright

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

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God is real.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

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What's red and invisible? We don't know that it's red.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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