If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Jimmy Saville

Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

what colour is a frog green you idiot

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

what happened when spongebob and Patrick were mean to sandy? she made a hurricane

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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