Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

I went river dancing once. I fell in

Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

A man walked into a bar owch

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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