Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Your Mother

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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whats worse than hitler? Anti-Jokes By darragh hamilton

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Where does a king keep his armies? In his sleevies

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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why doesnt jesus play hockey? he got nailed to the boards

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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