BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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What do you call a person with no legs and an eyepatch? Names.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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25.

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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