How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Cause its dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf uitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eugfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefniergfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fegfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'agfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8ggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cefnierlrngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubonggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8hgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[o8ggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5sgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cyr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cg[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,chnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,crhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ctv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cngtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,congtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cjyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ctkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cfnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,clrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[eu'abnrhlfhbcrupkgmgb[urh,ig,jc[itj,gijg,ip,gjijptubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ceu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,csyr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc8gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df97gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[ogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eugfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cf n,ebrfolcm43-hr4m[uohm=8o'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cg8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,chjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c3qugj],gjpcjr,c

thumb_up thumb_down -126

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse replies "My wife is dying of terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +4,029

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

thumb_up thumb_down +4

this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

you know what they say about men with big feet... damn you got some big feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops