Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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A wealthy businessman gets into an elevator with a poor, ragged janitor. They take the elevator up 19 floors. As the businessman leaves the elevator, he turns to the janitor and says, "Good day to you, sir."

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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I hate blackniggers

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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What do you call a fat priest? Obese

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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hi jonny

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Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

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Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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