How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

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NEVER

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

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What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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fun fact for the day: 100% of people that drink water die sooner or later

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Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

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A black baby dies and goes to Heaven. When god put wings on him the baby sais, "Ahh gee god am I an angel?" Then god sais, "Nahh nigga you a bat."

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S: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? P: They can chuck wood.

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poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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