Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a would chuck could chuck wood? Home depot

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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A paralysed man falls over.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

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i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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