Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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Hitler

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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