you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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Roxanne's hat looks like a condom

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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If u wanna get high, smoke weed

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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69!!! (its funny cause i made a referance to 69)

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Guess what?? What? I murdered your mother with a slimy piece of ham.

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High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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