Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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Yo mama so ugly people don't like to look at her.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

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what did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for easter AIDS

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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