- Anti Joke

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

Knock knock Who's there The police The police who? Ma'am your son is dead

snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

What did john say to bob Hey bob

What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

tommy is retared

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

What animal is green and eats rocks? The green rockeater

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA gargle" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."runs JOKES KILL >:}

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

bacon

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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