What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

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Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? You poke-er--face....pokerface.

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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dry handjob

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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call me maybe.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

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View Terms of Service

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Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

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A ginger rapping.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Iggy Azalea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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