What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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A shark ate your mom

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Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Vote this up

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have no idea how to rhyme, I like tacos

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what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

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Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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