Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than losing a board game? Cannibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar, and immediately sees a person with a big orange head seated near the back. He asked the bartender "why does that man have a big orange head?" "Buy him a drink and maybe he'll tell you." So the man bought him a drink and asked the guy with the big orange head why he has a big orange head, and he told him this story: "I was traveling in the sahara desert 10 years ago when I found a pure gold lamp in the sand. I rubbed the sand off so I could read what was on the side when a genie popped out and gave me 3 wishes. First I wished for many riches, and at once gold was all around my feet. Exited, I wished for the most beautiful wife in the world, and right in front of me appeared the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Third, I wished for a big orange head.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Chuck Norris is dead......

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

My friend was driving me home from a party, and was quite drunk. I was relieved that we did not get into a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

thumb_up thumb_down +9

*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Mr. T watched "the notebook"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops