Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

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Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

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What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

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Yo mama so fat, i rolled over twice and i still on that bitch.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Just Replying to Brock Facebook request Brock you should know by now that i am at your school talk to me there. Plus i loved the kiss you gave me in science. Now that tested my chemistry. Hehe. Emma Brown xOxOxOxXXXXXoOOOOO

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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