Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Justin Beiber

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24

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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corey is a nipplepotomus

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

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What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

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What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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