That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

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What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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How do you spell eight? 8

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Older.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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