a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

One time i ate a sandwich it was good

A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

What's the best joke in the world? This one.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen property that you should return immediately because the consequences of shop-lifting can prevent you from getting a good job and might land you in prison.

If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

Q: what do you call a man that see's a unicorn A: hallucinating

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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