Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why couldn't the black man swim. Because he had never been taught.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -81

what's worse than a joke about the holocaust? the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

thumb_up thumb_down -8

yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call a successful black person? A: A fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -257

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

thumb_up thumb_down +41

11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

thumb_up thumb_down +907

How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops