why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she cant use it, she is fat.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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I killed someone on minecraft.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

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I literally died laughing

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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