A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

what's the difference between a crocodile?

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

Your mother is average.

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

united we sit, cause we're fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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