why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

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When's the right time to join reality? Right now! Get off your computer!

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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why could the boy use the computer there was nothing wrong with him

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What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

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a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

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What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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