You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

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Knock knock Who's there? Micheal Jordan. Micheal Jordan who? Your an idiot

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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The Bible

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

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My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Why? Why not?

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops