Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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whats the best selling shampoo for children and family? gerrmany's shampoo german engineering. i'm not sure I get anti jokes wait you don't need engineering for soap? HITLER DID -audience- thats mean who else was mean? uhh Mao? Stalin? STDS? -audience- no HITERWAS MEAN wat happen to him he became the leader and fuher of germany and was onn world domination? no he died abullet and a pill died killed him oh god 11 million people died because of him and we make jokes about it -its ANITjokes okay? t make this S$75 any better doesn't revive the fallen -okay......... LOL I bet that soap was actually eaten before by actidneet -jesus shutup okay ok.. sorry man .. wait man? single person? but waht abut "audience" I guess I want a crowd as big as hitlers but all I get is my twisted autism - billy turner died from autism and arrested for practicing naziism in public.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Turkeys are obese

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What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I said so.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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dry handjob

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water jack collapsed because of serious drug abuse and stress jill followed after not being able to handle the tragedy of her brothers death this wouldn't have happened if they got into my van when i asked them too.

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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