WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

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what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

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Why did YUR MOM cross the road? To go slap her annoying-ass twelve year old for using "your mom" as an insult.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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darude- sandstorm

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What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops