Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

What is black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Black berries.

I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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