How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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Knock knock Who's there ... Hello? Is there anyone there? (In the bushes) Ha! He'll never suspect us!

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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What is 8===D- ? A jew with a lip piercing.

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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