Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Want to hear a joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So an irish man walks into a bar, 10 seconds later he is dead. What happened was there was a sharp piece of metal on the bar so is cut his throat and he bleed to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse walks into a bar. The impact fractures his skull immediately, knocking him unconscious. He then dies from the resulting brain damage.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats 2+2? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Darude - Sandstorm

thumb_up thumb_down +56

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +33

roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrHirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr can u find the r

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Female rights.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops