How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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I pooped.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

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Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

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What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

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Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

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What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

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the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

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Two Irish men walks out of a bar

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

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Today I decided to burn alot of calories. So I found a fat kid and lit him on fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was disturbed by two black men raping a young girl with leukemia.

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q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

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Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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