So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

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Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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