what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

Haha pizza

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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