What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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The man asks the blind man "where ya going"b The Blind man replies "i dont know".

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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The GOV and the WHO?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops