Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Chikin nuggets

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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what dyu call a jew on the moon? a problem. what dyu call ten jews on the moon? a bigger problem. what dyu call all the jews on the moon? problem solved.

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What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

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Ol-ive

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How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why is Jesse so fat? A horse, Because a cow gives milk thus creating pee wee Herman to jack off at an astonishing speed

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I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

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Rick Perry.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

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What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops