Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

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How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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Robert Mugabe.

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Face...the other white meat!

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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