What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down +4

-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what was hitlers rap album called? straight outta mein kampfton

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Dubstep < Music

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

racism...deal with it!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like rhymes Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down

A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats brown and smells bad poo

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops