Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

What time is it? Refrigerator

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

What's red and funny? The holocaust

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

watermelons are red, pineapples are yellow. i'm not a poet, say hello for me.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

roses are blue, violets are red, im colorblind

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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