Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

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ecks! why zee?

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

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What do u call a Mexican on the moon? An astronaut. What do u call all the Mexicans on the moon? Problem solved!!!

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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