So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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Lisa’ house needed to be painted and her brother offered to do it for her. Lisa thought it was a nice gesture and told him that she wanted the house in antique white. However; after painting the house, Lisa noticed that her brother had used a color with a dark yellow tone. ”Are you sure this is Antique white?” she asked him. ”Offcourse!” he said. Afraid of hurting his feelings, Lisa didn’t dare to say anything. Ten years later, the house needed to be painted again. This time Lisa wanted to hire a professional painter, but her brother insisted on doing for her. He brought the paint, which Lisa recognized as the same yellow paint, with a color that Lisa had really begun to hate. ”Brother, are you sure this is antique white?” she asked, forcing a seriousness in her voice. ”Offcourse!” he answered, and Lisa was still too embarressed to object. Her brother didn’t have an easy life and she didn’t want to break his confidence. So the house was painted, same as before. Lisa did however notice a strange light in her brothers eyes. Another ten years passed, and the house needed to be painted a third time. This time however Lisa had had enough. Though it was her brother, she had become increasingly ashamed of her house had even stopped having guests over. With a deep breath she picked up the phone and called up her brother, ready to confront him. A woman answered; it was his wife. She could hardly speak because of her sobbing. Unfortunately Lisa’s brother had been killed in a car accident earlier that day.

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Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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this kid named terry stockton thought it was funny to get someone in the ankle lace then the kid got up and pucnched him in the face so hard he had a seizure

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Religion

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

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Why could the boy not stop shaking? He has Parkinsons Syndrome.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Get some flipping new jokes people

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

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Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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shea kisses a girl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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