Why did the chicken cross the road? For fitness! ...yeah... nobody laughed when Jonah Hill said it either... awkward

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the cab driver say to the black man when he got into his cab? Where to, sir?

thumb_up thumb_down +1,289

A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What Did The Farmer When He Lost His Tractor? "Wheres my Tracto?"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you leave a man in suspense...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have legs to walk and they are not able to fly across the road, like the rest of their bird friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar. He recieves a concussion and dies of internal bleeding 3 hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Spotto

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Oliver's friends

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops