What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

roses are red violets are blue i hate black people

why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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