The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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HOLY SHIT!!!!

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What do you do when someone tries to rob you at gunpoint Well first thing you have to do is think why am I in this situation? Then what can I do to avoid this again Finally think about how you're going to pay your medical bill. You were to busy thinking, to notice you just got shot and robbed.

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Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

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What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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why did the dog eat its breakfast of meat because he was hungry

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

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Horse with a chair on his head.

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Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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How did th-A fridge.

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What do you call a sleeping bull? Don't call him anything and back away slowly.

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I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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