Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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Q: Why was it bad to be a black jew during the Holocaust? A: You had to sit at the back of the gas chamber

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kieran is a homosexual

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Welcome to die!

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

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What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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