Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

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How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

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what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

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If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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Women's rights.

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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myspace

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A 14 year girl enjoys exploring the sexual regions of her body, whilst having one of her intimate sessions her brother walks into her room. Her brother was a rather sexual 17 year old, who has had sex with several different girls, and is not afraid to try new things. the brother says " get a room to his sister... oh wait" and walks out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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