A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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What did the asian do with his homework? finish it. as is expected from children his age.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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civil rights

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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What was wrong with the black guy? He was black

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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