oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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-What's the difference between a frog? - it jumps higher.

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True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

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What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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anus

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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knock knock who's there aids aids who ... dumb ass

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Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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tim has no humor

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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A man reaches to grab a womans chest and then realizing hes gay, backs off and everyone goes home happy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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