Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

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Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

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Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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why did the chickan cross the road? who let the chickan out?

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Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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BOTTOM!!!

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

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slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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