What do you call batman when we lost all his money? Broke

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What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

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Knock Knock Who's there A serial rapist

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

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What's worse than a worm in your holocaust? An apple.

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This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

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Ass

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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