Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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No!

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What do you call a depressed nerd who plays WoW. Me....

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what's worse than getting beaten by police? Getting beaten by Russian police

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

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What did the hobo find on the ground? A dirty nipple. ~Logan F.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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Your Mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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