A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

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wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Prior to this incident he was being chased by a psychopathec killer who had just murdered his family. As he was escaping on his bike, the murder's lookout who was holding a shotgun, swung the butt end of the gun, causing severe brain damage and eventually death to the escaping boy, also causing him to topple over on his bycicle.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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I cant think of one (._. )

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Mitt Romney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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