why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the vampire die? He had AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why do gingers have red hair? Its genetically encoded in their DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I want seaman but sex with interracial men body builders. Please call me - 843-813-2788

thumb_up thumb_down -20

conrad profit

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a hippopotamus? An orangutan.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your mom is so fat she could consider going on biggest loser, where she might be able to make a lot of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Dislike this.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops