What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

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Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom.

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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Why did the Jewish man dive into the street to pick up a penny? He was Tevye, a character from the famous play Fiddler on the Roof and pennies are valuable and rare in Tsarist Russia in 1905.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

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Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Guest what in the butt

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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What do you do when you see a black man limping in your yard? You invite him inside, ask him what happened, and possibly call an ambulance if, God forbid, the situation is that serious.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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