What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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what do u call a black man a black man

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

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what do you watch ? a tv

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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