Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? I don't know

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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Have you heard of the mute man that kept telling people he could not talk? Its funny because its true.

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are simple-minded creatures and perhaps there was some source of food on the other side.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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What do old people really like? Sex.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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