Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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What is life? Paul.

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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SHUT UP JP

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Justin Bieber

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what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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