I had friends on the Death Star.

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Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

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what was hitlers rap album called? straight outta mein kampfton

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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my egg roll

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Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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kcuf read it backwards

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a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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Justin Beiber

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

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whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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