Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

There once was a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer in a room without an exit. The ceiling catches fire. They all die.

Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Why wasn't jimmy at Paul's party? He died in a fatal car crash and flew out y The windshield and landed in boiling oil then a dog ate him.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

your moms so fat she has kankles

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

Whats the difference between a baby and my freezer? I don't stick my meat in the freezer!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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