What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

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What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

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what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Just two animals that are judged.

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Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

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What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? Lots of stuff.

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Q: If a midget walks by a woman stops and says "your hair smells nice today" is it sexual harassment? A: Yes, sexual harassment is a very serious subject and should not be allowed no matter your race, religion, or size.

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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An irish man walks into a bar... Hes met with an intervention of family and friends who are all very concerned about his drinking problem and well being.

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How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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