Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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I saw a guy walking down the street like a black person. I just shook my head and smiled. He WAS black.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

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How do you kill a cow while your carrying a gun Shoot him

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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