A dog walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out as animals are not allowed.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

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Milk MILK MILK MILK M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K What do cows drink? Water, and if you thought it was milk, your probably retarded.

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A scientists walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him, and asks him what he wants to drink. The scientist replies, "Just a coke, today. I'm driving."

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? because he is dead -Eden Hogg

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

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What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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I went to the store and I fell

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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