Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

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Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

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What did the sick kid get for cancer? Christmas

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

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Are you a human?

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

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Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

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Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

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What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

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Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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