Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

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John is typing... *2 seconds later" John: Hi

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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How did the old man keep the kids off his lawn? By molesting their Moms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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