roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

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A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

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Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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A black man and an asian woman have a baby. Then a hispanic and a native american have a baby. Their babies have a baby. What is the baby? Society's worst nightmare.

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Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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david give me my money back... i will have it next week

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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