How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

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A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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clamidia

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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u know y blondes and tornadoes r so alike? first theres a lot of blowing and sucking, and then u lose ur house!

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

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01010111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110010 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01101001 01110100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110010 01101101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101000 01100001 01101100 01100110 00100000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01101100 01100101 00111111 00100000 00001010 00001010 00001010 00001010 01001110 01101111 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01100111 Translate

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Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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