Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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What did the deaf person see? He was blind too, so he didn't see anything.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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I love you

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

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Q: if you spend more than 10 minutes on anti-joke.com, you will soon start to see some of the problems with the user experience. name some and propose solutions. A: Well, as you said, there are many. But a huge one is all the repeat jokes. The site could really benefit from some mechanism to identify repeat jokes.

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Chicken penis.

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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kyle dosnt question his sexuality

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whats funnier than 24? 25

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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