My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Black History Month

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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The geese of Growmore

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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