Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

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Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

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a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

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Why is Justin Bieber better than Freddie Mercury? Freddie Mercury is dead. Justin Bieber is still alive. Also Freddie Mercury is ugly and Justin is hot.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

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Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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