Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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whats the differnce between a cadilack and a pile of dead babies? theres no cadilack in the back of my car1 >.>

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A blind man walks into a wall.

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Watch your lips.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

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Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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