Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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Josh Hamilton walks into a bar.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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A black person in the NHL

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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According to standard table etiquette what is rude when someone passes you the salt? Jamming a fork in their eye

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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