A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

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why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

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Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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why did joe drop his clock? billy ran into him, therfore making the clock wobble in his hand until it fell at 34 mph.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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8

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Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

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Q: what is the difference between a baby stroller and a black man. A: I don't try and hit black men when they cross the street.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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