What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

Come on Red, I am linked with the fucking global bank, that does not mean I go there and get the money! The FBI keeps tabs on absolutely everything, everybody knows that, if Mike Tyson has a cup of tea there, they file him down. Its legal, its secure and incredibly expensive, but the FBI stands for the security of the US alone, that does not mean that they do not work with every other corporation, organization, affiliation,syndicate, and pff, anything. If you suspect that I somehow went from being one of the key members of the underground, to a fucking FBI agent, you can believe that, but then dont ask me for help, nor be my friend, without trust there is no friendship.

'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

A blind man walks into a wall.

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "So why are you so happy?" The amputee doesn't answer because he has been completely deaf, blind and mute since birth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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