Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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Black people are the scum of the earth

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

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What did the toaster say to the raisin? Nothing. The toaster was mute and the raisin had lost his hearing in a terrible full-contact origami accident.

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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"stupid creationist" Perfect example of redundance.

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Good boy

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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