Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

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Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

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What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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I won the game.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

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children of those parents which re childless, often are childless too...

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Hey I just met you,and this is crazy,please stand up,if you're the real slim shady.

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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