Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

In soviet russia, 6 is not afraid of 7

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here!" The other one says "We're both going to die in here and nobody will hear us scream."

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

Roses are black, Violets are too. I am colorblind, How about you?

Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

Knock knock. Who's there? Steve Jensen. Oh hi Steve, come in.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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