A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

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A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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Lil Wayne

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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Robin, get in the batmobile.

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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