Why do you never see hippopotamus hiding in trees? They are really good at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

thumb_up thumb_down +16

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

thumb_up thumb_down -42

what do you call gingers ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are numerous things worse than finding a worm in your apple. Some include the holocaust and nuclear warfare

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's big and black? A black fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between meat and fish? You can't beat your fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops