Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

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What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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I died shortly after writing this.

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

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Dumb

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lebron

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If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

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what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

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what do u call a apple a apple

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Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

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What is red and green, red and green, red and green? A frog in a blender.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

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What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

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Japan called... They need help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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