What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

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Why did the child cross the road? Her parents were abusing her and she wanted to get hit by a car.

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I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

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2 black guys are riding in a car, whos driving? The cops.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

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A black man is sitting in front of the bus Then he respectfully gives up his seat to an elder woman

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

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what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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A woman walks into a bar but is promptly returned to her kitchen by an officer of the law. Later that same evening, she is beaten mercilessly by her husband for her outright disrespect for the social restrictions imposed upon her gender.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dog? Niether did she

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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