So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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A guy asked his Girlfriend to marry him. She said Hey! a Dump Truck! and the mental Boyfriend forgot all about the Proposal and was amazed by the Dump Truck.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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I WILL DESTROY ISIS

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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