How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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im not food

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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What did Batman get for Christmas. Nothing his parents are dead.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

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Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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My children are mistakes

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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A African americia and a Hispanic are in a car, who's driving? The police man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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