What do black people and apples have in common? - They both look good hanging from trees.

What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Praise Paisley

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

Q: which of the following is a prime number? A: 17

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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