Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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live babies

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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25

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What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Mark Wilson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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