Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

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What will you never see? A white guy that camp jump.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Your mom is so old, that she should probably up her B-12 intake to avoid sickness.

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Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

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lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Yes!

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What's pink and wrinkley and hangs out your pj's? Ya nanna :)

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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