What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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What happens when you leave Toby alone in your house? He eats your carpet, some pillows, ur dog, ned, neds dog and a glass panel. This is why 2 +h = plugger +Mount Everest (I is potato annoying). Bonjour.

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A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

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You all have Aids

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When will Abe Vigoda be alive again? Never. There will never again be a time when Abe Vigoda will be alive. For example, Abe Vigoda will be dead for the entirety of the year 2038. He will continue to be dead if we move forward to the year 2091, and even if we keep jumping forward throughout history, stopping in the years 2250, 2871, and 3546, we will not land in an era when Abe Vigoda will be alive. Another way to look at this is to imagine Abe Vigoda had died in earlier years. Let's say he had died in 1902. Would he be alive today? The answer, sadly, is no. We get the same answer if we suppose Abe Vigoda had died in 1822, 1715, or ~ 85,200,000 BPE. To sum up, it is not precisely accurate to say that Abe Vigoda will be dead for a very long time. That implies a limit on the amount of time he will be dead. There is no limit.

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

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What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

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what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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What is an anti-joke? This is.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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