What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Tuberculosis

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Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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what?

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? Doctor Brown, I have your test results, you've HIV positive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops