What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Women's Rights.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race, she died in a fire.

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

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why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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