What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

thumb_up thumb_down -12

If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

thumb_up thumb_down +10

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

thumb_up thumb_down

A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops