what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

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QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

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Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

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- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Whats fat and gay joe diragi

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How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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Friends are a lot like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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what do you call someone who kills jews? a life saver

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops