What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

Dead on Aodhan your breaking te ten commandments by lying you jew you dont believe in the divinity of Christ.

Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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