Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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yo momma so fat. that shes fat

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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An man walks to a bra

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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