women's rights

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

Scott

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

'Knock Knock' 'Who's there?' 'My name is Boo, I'm sorry,I think I was given the wrong address, I'll be on my way now' Boo walks away from the unsuspecting person's front door and goes to the next house along in the hope of finding the house he was originally searching for.

What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

this website...

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "No, all days are 24 hours long" the man replies, amazed at how uneducated the bartender is.

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

Previous Next SERIOUSLY EVERONE! I STRICTLY FORBID YOU TO GIVE MY COMMENT A GREEN THUMB! BECAUSE THEN I WOULD DIE A VIOLENT DEATH AND BURN IN THE FLAMES OF HELL! DO YOU HEAR ME! YEEEEAH, YOU BETTER GIVE ME A RED THUMB! YEAH! BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT? I COULD NOT STAND THE THOUGHT OF MORE THAN ONE! GREEN THUMB! I WOULD JUST DIE AND YOU WOULD BE LEFT WITH THE GUILT! YEAH! PEOPLE WOULD HATE YOU! HATE! HATE! YOU AS THEIR HERO! I MEAN THEIR NERO... Same same... DIES! YES! Moral: CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED! YOU DO NOT WANT ME TO DIE, REPEAT AFTER ME: "I MUST GIVE NERO RED THUMBS, I MUST GIVE NERO RED THUMBS! I AM UNDER HIS CONTROL! I MUUUUST GIVE NERO RED THUMBS! YES DO MY BIDDING PEASANTS AND I SHALL SHALL BUILD THE FORTRESS OF SALTITUDE! ... WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT GREEN THUMB! PUT IT DOWN AND PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR! NO NOT UP, THE THUMB MUST BE DOWN! ...I am looking at you there... "YES YOU! NOT EVERYBODY ELSE! JUST YOU! YEEES I SEE YOU WAVING THAT NASTY GREEN THUMB OF YOURS! YEAH! SHAME ON YOU! WHAT WILL EVERYBODY ELSE BUT YOU THINK ABOUT THAT HUH? ...I will be silent now... But I am still watching, yeah! I am constantly here... ZzzzZzzz... AND AWAKE!... ..:SERIOUSLY! GREEN THUMB IS VERBOTEN! IT IS NAZI, IT IS HITLER! SHAME! SHAAME! Moral: Now, do you want my death by green thumb on your conscience? SHAAAAME! WHAT WILL THE COMMUNITY DO TO YOU! DO YOU NEVER THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!? And next time on Dragonball DONTGIVEAFUCKING GREENTHUMBEVER Z! I shall be the one and only to give myself a green thumb, but remember... I am still watching... At you.... Now, I will stop talking... BUT RED THUMBS ONLY! *ME EVER PRESENT RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW! AND NOW! AND NOW! AND YOU MY POINT... YOU BETTER! I MEAN MAYBE I HAVE NOT BEEN CLEAR ENOUGH HERE, BUT THIS COMMENT SHALL HAVE A GREEN THUMB UP FROM THE CHOSEN ONLY, MEEEEEE!*

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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