Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

whats worse than stubbing your toe? being gang raped and then killed

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -The Pizza you ordered. -Oh thank you very much. -That'll be $10. -Here you go. -Thank you very much, sir. Enjoy your meal.

Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

why was justin sad? his family was murdered

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...