Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

What's worse than the holocaust? Peoples' bad attempts at Anti-Jokes.

Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well, one must question: 1. How much the electrician knows when it comes to screwing in lightbulbs. 2. The amount of electricians present at the scene. 3. The type of equipment being used in the process. 4. The physical and mental stability of the electrician. The situation is solely dependent on the above factors.

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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