What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the Asian student ask for a calculator? Because he was busy washing the dishes and thought a calculator would be completely inappropriate for the situation at hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +321

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

roses are red violets are blue i have alziemers what are we talking about again

thumb_up thumb_down +1

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a desert island together. They eventually succumb to dehydration and heat exhaustion. They lasted five days.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +9

your mamma so dumb she makes frankienstien look smart

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chris is hairy

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops