How do black men eat chicken? Chicken goes in bone come out.

why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens are very absent-minded creatures. the chances are the chicken saw some form of bug or other edible life form from across the road and decided to venture over in that direction. if the road was not there, the chicken would most likely have still crossed that same expanse of ground, regardless of potential consequences.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

A man walks into a bar. ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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