My mate mated with my mate's mate. mated of course meaning fucked.

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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Cheese

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what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$$$bOoBiEs

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

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What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby wearing a clown suit.

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I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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