Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

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A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

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What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

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What do two black guys do when they walk into the convienent store with masks? Buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

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Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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Rebecca Black

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops