Denard Robinson

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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A man died.

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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GONNA

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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What type of person does a black guy go to when he's sick? The doctor

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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