Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

Roses are black, violets are black, i am blind!

How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

How do you know when you're on a Jewish golf course? The players don't yell 'FORE' they yell '$3.99!' @Obsequiously

Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

Q: Why do people post the same anti-joke a bajillion times in a row? A: Because they are stupid ass holes with absolutely no life.

"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

If a bear was mad he would be beary angry.

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...