Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the side of the road? A: To get to the other vagina

Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

roses are red violets are blue grass is green

Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

If you are on this site, you have a shitty life. It is even shittier if you read this.

Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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