What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

Susie fell of a swing and died Knock Knock Who's there Susie

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

a man makes a bad joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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