Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

A friend of yours tells you his version of The Aristocrats. You just wasted about 5-20 minutes of your life.

Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

Mullets

A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a trash can? -Finding a dead baby in 5 trash cans

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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