Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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why am i on this site? cause its funny

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

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why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

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Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

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Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

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Have you heard about the angry chef? He beat his children

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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