What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

One time I masturbated by myself

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

sorry son your nanas been put down

Q: What did the Black man say to the kool ade Man? A: You're not real -BonkersLive

Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Penis!

How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

I had sex with my mother in law

What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

Darude - Sandstorm

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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