so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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what's wrong on so many levels? wrong wrong wrong wrong

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Why did Cody sit in the corner? Because his daddy didn't love him. #DaddyDoesn'tLoveYouAnymoreChair

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A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

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A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

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72

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

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Roses are red violets are blue you better run I see you

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a Ku Klux Klan member who has been set on fire? Burnt Marshmallow.

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its all aodhan

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Yo mama's so old, she might die soon

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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A man walks into a bar... has a beer then leaves to his beautiful wife and his 2 children

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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There's an Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

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One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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