What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

PEANIS!

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

What do you call Obama? - the president

Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Why did the blond girl get fired from the M&M Factory. Becouse she removed all the W's

What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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