What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

thumb_up thumb_down -30

your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

thumb_up thumb_down +34

It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Freddie Mercurys teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A fat guy walks into a bar and the bartender says, "the regular?" The fat man replies, "actually this time I wanna try something different."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

thumb_up thumb_down -9

oh hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops