Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? A BIKE!

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

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I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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This is an anti joke

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

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Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

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Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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