I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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mooooh im a cow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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Yo mammas so stupid she has a profound intellectual disability.

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

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Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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So I was making this bagel right?And my dad walks in while I'm making this bagel(cause we're in a rush you know?) and he's yells"HURRY UP!!!!"I'm like man.... I sure do got alot of YELL in my bagel .

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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