Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Black People.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

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Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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Larchmont Park is the biggest shithole in the european union - Only the jippo part tho, lots of flies live in that part <3

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

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Women's Sports

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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A black guy walks into a kkk meeting.

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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