Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and sticky? My ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did the man say to the other man? hi

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock who's there I killed your family

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Two elks were out flying one day. One of the elks turned to the other one and said: - You have a cinnemon bun in your eye. - What? - You have a cinnamon bun in your eye! - WHAT? - YOU HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN YOUR EYE!!! - I CAN'T HEAR YOU, I HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN MY EYE!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you mix tea and sugar? sweet tea...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops