There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

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no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

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A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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