Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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what's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

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A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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your mom is so dumb she threw a rock at the ground and missed

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

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FAP

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Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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