What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

okay so theres this guy.

whats the difference between an orange and a bicycle? One has handlebars..the other one doesnt.

When you hit an animal Realize your out of your mind Then realize the animals mind is over there in the ditch.

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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