Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

who's a slut... you're mom

Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

Anything involving women..

on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawer? we are both lawyers

A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

A priest was walking home from church one day when he found a young boy crouching naked in the bushes. The priest contacted local law enforcement authorities on his cell phone and proceeded home once they arrived.

A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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