The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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Hey, come here often? No.

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs? A: Russell

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How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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This one time at band camp....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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what do you call a retarded kid? jack kamstra

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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Hello penis

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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Compton

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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