A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. It was the chickens decision thus, not affecting your life greatly. You should therefore mind your own business and let the chicken live his life with capability of using it's rights.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

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Fuck her

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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What's purple and glows? An electric grape

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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