Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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how many black people are... wait stereotypical jokes are for fags

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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I have a crush on my dad.

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

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I had a submarine.... once

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I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he obviously had to attend to his planned schedule which involved a meeting which was to take place on the opposite side of the road.

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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The geese of Growmore

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Exactly what?

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What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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