Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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Q. What did Tarzan Say when he met Jane? A. Tarzan Being raised by apes and not learning English would have no knowledge of the language and would probably hoot and screech like his fellow ape brothers

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Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

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Why did Sally have a bad vacation? Sally was shot at by a sniper.

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What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops. What's worse than being raped by a Triceratops? Being gang raped by a herd of Triceratops.

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Doctor, I keep imagining Doctors. *hayball rolls*

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Why did the black guy get fired from his job. I asked first.

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What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

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An Israeli, a Palestinian and an American walk into a bar. The Israeli shoots the Palestinian and says it was self defence. The American agrees with him.

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Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing.He's dead.

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What did the creepy old man do to the child? Took him to baseball practice

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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why are fire engines red? well books are red magazines are red 2 two plus two is four four times three is 12 there are 12 inches in a ruler queen elizabeth was a ruler, queen elizabeth was also a ship, ships sail in the sea fish swim in the sea, fish have fins, fins fought the russians, russians are always red, fire engines are always russian. and THAT is why fire engines are red....

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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A guy walks into a store and buys a sandwich.

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

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Why was Michelle crying? I don't know. Neither do I.

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Whats blue and smells like grass? Boise States football field

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops