Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

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learn the ropes?

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? Just about anything because child mortality is not funny.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

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what do you do when you see the klu klucks klan ? act white

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

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This couple is having the most passionate sex ever one night, and the guy cums before he gets a chance to pull out. He gets the woman pregnant. Now they are married.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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