Why didn't the kid get a bike for Christmas? Because his parents died and Santa's not real

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

Un petit gars se plante en vélo et il se met à pleurer.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A satisfied elephant and a dead poodle.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

What's the difference between a bomb and a muslim? Nothing. The difference is only apparent. At the fundamental basic building blocks of the universe, everything is made up of quarks.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Bing

If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

did you here the one about the disabled downs child dying? of course you didn't that would be a horrible joke

what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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