"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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What is worse than standing on a plug? finding out your family have all been killen in a horrible car crash and your neighbours daughter who happens to be your friend has cancer.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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