How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

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why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

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Knock knock, come in.

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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My life

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Chris Bosh's neck

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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Scientology.

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Why did the Afircan child die? He had AIDS.

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops