Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

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Which side of an ostrich has the most feathers? Obviously the outside! Who would be so low educated to even have the idea that an ostrich can have feathers on the inside of it's body?

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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Yeah I am sure nobody understood that one... Just be careful in the future. Besides you are supposed to link your "Moral" to the Solvemedia, I suggest you do not post, until you understand things further, I only suggest, but you know that if you become exposed or a threat towards outstanding forces, you become a threat to us all, to our and your fundation, this will not be tolerated unless your desire is to destroy your on fundation, if so, you risk that the desire of the entire fundation, is to destroy you, something which I of course will allow, as I am the leader, not the boss, I do not create nor enforce rules, only guidelines. Moral the friendly neighborhood R*pist: "being new, is no excuse to risk exposing shadows to the light"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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