"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

Mogok Papiti.

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

Jews who wear penny loafers...

Connor "Rusty" McLeod

What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

If you're happy and you know it go to hell.

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

What happen when you put a Ciara and a Charlie together? They have sex.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monekey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the girl fall of of her bike? She was hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

Opinions are like assholes... ...they're both nouns.

dassa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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