"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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What isn't funny? The holacost.

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Roses are red violet are blue i saw a machine and it was ps2

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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What happend to the murderer who ate people? He was sent to jail for a number of years and now is having work done to stop him from eating people

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What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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