What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

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So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

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Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

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What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

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What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

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A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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Your mamas so fat. She fat.

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Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

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Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy are stranded in the middle of a desert. After many days of not finding food, water, or shelter they contemplate cannibalism to survive, but can't decide who to eat. The mexican dies first for an unrelated reason

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head walk into a bar They are friends from school and have not seen each other in 15 years; they are hoping to have a good night out

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Me! Hi

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There was a lil girl in a red hoody skipping to her grandma's house. When she got there she noticed her grandma wasn't home. The lil girl panics and see's a wolf. She hesitates and asks the wolf "Have you seen my grandma" The wolf replies with a yes, shes in the backyard planting flowers.

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The WNBA.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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