What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

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Minecraft.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! That's not a fly, it's a gnat.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

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69

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of the bar? He was riding a jack hammer

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yo mamas so fat she probably has to wear a gerdle when she leaves the house.

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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