You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

You: Mike and Steve were playing chess, who won? Them: Mike You: no, it was steve

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

Kim Kardashian.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

Women's rights

Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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