How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

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Why did the Muslim get on the plane in New York? To go visit his dying aunt in Memphis.

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A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

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Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

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How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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