Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

gays

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Because he was bringing food to support his wife and 3 kids whom were very hungry and needed it to survive.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

penis hehehehe

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

How did the boy break his hand? He slammed it in a car door.

Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

Ian's mind Elevator music

What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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