You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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black people

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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Q: What did the mentaly retarded kid get on his IQ test A: Drool

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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long in the tooth!

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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you know whats worse then losing your banjo? finding a spleen in it's place

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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