How do pigs get hurt? They are run over by a tractor.

What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

Internet Explorer

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

Obama-Care

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

why is georgia shit at making jokes i dont know

Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? A Ferrari was never alive.

whats annoying and black? black people

When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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