What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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whats red and and has 202 legs? an ostrich, ok i lied about 200 legs and the red part

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (a police officer steps in and says): What is red and green and peed all over? I dont know Im sorry to say, but its your mother. A group of teens killed her and defiled her body with urine. She was wearing green.

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

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Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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