whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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