How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

diarrhea, diarrhea, duh duh diarrhea, I flush someone down the potty with my diarrhea Duh, duh diarrhea I want to marry my diarrhea duh duh diarrhea. Written by Niggalyncha666

Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

what do you call a black man driving a police car? a cop

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

this website is a bad joke

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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