Why didn't Wendy want to sit down? Because her dad put a hand full of needles in her anus. - D

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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