Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

How do you cure AIDS? You can't.

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

George W. Bush

What would Michael Jackson do if he saw a naked child alone in an alleyway? It is unknown, as he cannot be asked about this hypothetical scenario due to his passing in 2009.

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

where are you?

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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