How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

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whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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Sam Hengal.

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Make it? Sodium levels? Means he is eating right? Its not ADHD, the chatter is his way of coping with pain and what I believe is PTSD (dont tell him, he would get mad, if he gets that blank stare while chatting a lot its like he is back in the past for a while, please distract him out of it, but dont tell him anything about that. Give him what he wants, its a secret but Nero masters hypnosis, and he pretty much knows himself to a point far beyond others know themselves, he can sense lies and knows how others are feeling just by the movement of their pupils, their eyes, their breath, the tonality of their voice and lots of things like that, I think thats some sort of hypnosis as well, he uses ritalin in order to focus and shut off pain receptors mentally and stuff I don't understand, I am sure he would not ask for it unless he knew he could take it, he has literally performed surgery on himself before, the kind that would kill anyone unless under strong anesthetics. (removed bullets from the back of his skull, people say its just a myth, but I was there so I know its true) Please trust me on this as weird as it might sound.

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why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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