Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Q: Why isn't Michael Jordan able to jump into space with only 1 leap? A: If that were possible, the supposedly absolute laws of physics would've been irreversibly violated to the full extent that the future of science would be in trouble and the future of some already mentally-unstable people would've been deeply jeopardized to a state that they couldn't naturally recover from.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because people have encroached on it's natural habitat.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops