What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? Learn to duck.

Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

Looking for propane accessories? Well look no more!

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

what do mexicans need to survive............. a truck load of herowin and BOARDERS!!!!!!!!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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