a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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Jasper sucks.

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Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

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Thats sweet, thank you then.

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

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What is a pirate's favorite color? It depends on the pirate.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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